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Accepting What Is

There’s a popular saying, “It is what it is.” Simple. Clear. To the point. What it means is that it’s best to accept your reality as it is. For example, your child spills a glass of water. You can get annoyed and yell, or you can just clean it up and accept that it happened. After all, it was an accident.

Too often, we get all wrapped up in arguing with what is. We actually believe we can outthink what is happening right now in the present moment. But reality always wins.

That doesn’t mean you can’t change the future. But in order to change the future, you have to begin with accepting what is happening in the here and now. Often acceptance of reality is stymied by one’s desire to control. You think that if you can just control that other person, place, thing or situation, everything will be fine. It’s hardest to accept things that are completely out of your control (rain on your daughter’s wedding day, for instance), but these are the things you absolutely must let go of – they are completely out of your control. Nothing you do or don’t do, say or don’t say, can change the laws of nature, so accept what is and move forward.

If you don’t like something that is happening in your life right now, if your life feels chaotic and out of control, take a step back and try some focused and relaxed deep breathing. When you focus on the problem or situation that is out of your control, it generally gets worse. When you focus on what you don’t want or can’t live with you’ll never attract what you really do want!

Try some gratitude for things in your life that are going well and remember, “This too shall pass.” Make choices in the here and now that can actually move you toward what you really want. Talk to others and consider the advice of someone who has been where you are. Understand in your heart, as well as your head, that everything happens for a reason and that accepting this is part of the solution. Just remember…acceptance doesn’t mean you have to like it.

When you accept that everything is as it is supposed to be, you can begin to move toward solutions to improve the undesirable aspects of your life. Remember too that you never ask “why” when something good happens, so don’t ask “why” when something you consider “bad” happens. Bolster yourself with faith that all will work out and believe that it will. Remember – your thoughts create your life – so make them positive and all will be well!